It's amazing to me all that needs to be done and placed on the "to do" list when you transition. Thus far I've opened up a bank account, got a new cell number (which is kind of annoying now that I have to let everyone know it somehow!), got a new phone (not a priority but a fun toy), and began to cast a vision for ministry.
What's even more amazing to me is ministry! It's amazing how in one quick moment you can go from hanging out with a bunch of kids getting cake in the face and the next you have two students in a serious brawl, a student telling you some of the deepest darkest secrets of their life, another fight almost break out...and no sooner did you finish a message on respect and those very kids who were sitting there are the ones gossiping and disrespecting the adults around them! It's so much discouraging as it is confusing!
I think I'm finding that ministry is so volatile and can change at any moment! The people are great and you enjoy being with them...the next moment you can't believe what you are hearing or seeing and want to get away!
Thank God that ministry isn't about me and whether or not I have all the answers, techniques, styles, dynamics, etc. I just pray that as I strive to be faithful to God and allow God to use me as his vessel to share love, grace and mercy - in some way I pray for God's transforming presence and spirit to be real and evident in these lives (including mine)!
Grace and Peace!
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Friday, September 01, 2006
I can't tell if I'm too much of an idealist and less of a realist - but I can't help but think that to be truly Christian is to be kind of absurd in certain areas. I'm sure you're wondering what I'm referring to...
Today I came into the church to work on my sermon and get things ready for Sunday's service. When I got in after checking my mailbox and seeing if I had any messages I noticed a couple who had wandered into the foyer of our office area. Our secretary went and met them and proceeded to bring them down to our compassionate ministries area. There they were able to find clothing and other things that they needed. The one woman was pregnant and the couple was obviously in need. It was great that we had the opportunity to be used in this sense. They were down in this area for a long period of time looking through much of what we had. I felt as though we were trying to rush them out because they were infringing on our time in the office. There was an air of anxiousness as the minutes continued to pass on.
They finished and we were able to give them some food and talk with them a little. The woman wanted to know our address so she could send pictures of her children when they were born. The reality is I felt as though as her and her husband hung around they wanted more and felt like we in the office felt like, "If we don't have too much eye contact and don't talk with them - they'll go away."
The couple needed a ride to the bus station. I offered and I took them. I truly felt as though the couple felt as though they had to act MORE "christian" or prove themselves so I didn't think less of them as I drove. As I dropped them off I was hit with a rush of questions and thoughts!
Why were we so anxious about having them at the church and taking more time than WE thought they needed?
When I got back, the conversation was about money and whether or not to give them money or anyone who comes for that matter! I learned they had problems in the past here at the church. I understand that we have to be good stewards of our money and resources but sometimes I wonder. I wonder if we use the word "stewardship" just as an excuse to be LESS generous! Would Jesus give them money? Would Jesus wish He had a social worker to ask the RIGHT questions? Or would Jesus use his last dollar to help that person out? I find myself wondering if the absurdity and scandal of the cross is truly softened by our American, westernized, version of Christianity? Jesus in an absurd display of generosity gave His life! Jesus, in a scandalous show of grace stopped a whole crowd from stoning an adulterer in the act! Why are we so afraid of this kind of absurd and scandalous grace and hospitality? What are we afraid of? Are we afraid of going broke? Are we afraid that we won't have enough for ourselves? Whatever happened to the absurd kind of trust that the Israelites were called to? When did we lose that kind of trust in the PROVISION and GRACE of God?
I'm not perfect by any means and I'm just as guilty today in my anxiety and uncomfort in this face of my neighbor in need. I will say this though. We were worried about the screening process and giving the "right" or "appropriate" resources. I will say this though...this woman today was willing to give us a picture of her children. Probably all she could really give as a sign of appreciation. Which offering was God more please with - her gift of a photo - possibly all she could give or our gift of some clothes and food that cost us nothing? I can't tell you how challenged I am by these thoughts. May I live out a Christianity that is so gracious, loving, daring, risky and scandalous that my life looks more like Jesus everyday! I'm sick and tired of a wimpy Christianity. Last time I checked the goal was to be the hands and feet of Jesus. Last time I checked those hands and feet were pierced. Christianity takes a faith and trust in a God who CAN make me like Jesus. Not by my effort but by God's Spririt! If that's an ideal...then I guess I'm guilty as charged as an IDEALIST!
PEACE ON THE JOURNEY
Today I came into the church to work on my sermon and get things ready for Sunday's service. When I got in after checking my mailbox and seeing if I had any messages I noticed a couple who had wandered into the foyer of our office area. Our secretary went and met them and proceeded to bring them down to our compassionate ministries area. There they were able to find clothing and other things that they needed. The one woman was pregnant and the couple was obviously in need. It was great that we had the opportunity to be used in this sense. They were down in this area for a long period of time looking through much of what we had. I felt as though we were trying to rush them out because they were infringing on our time in the office. There was an air of anxiousness as the minutes continued to pass on.
They finished and we were able to give them some food and talk with them a little. The woman wanted to know our address so she could send pictures of her children when they were born. The reality is I felt as though as her and her husband hung around they wanted more and felt like we in the office felt like, "If we don't have too much eye contact and don't talk with them - they'll go away."
The couple needed a ride to the bus station. I offered and I took them. I truly felt as though the couple felt as though they had to act MORE "christian" or prove themselves so I didn't think less of them as I drove. As I dropped them off I was hit with a rush of questions and thoughts!
Why were we so anxious about having them at the church and taking more time than WE thought they needed?
When I got back, the conversation was about money and whether or not to give them money or anyone who comes for that matter! I learned they had problems in the past here at the church. I understand that we have to be good stewards of our money and resources but sometimes I wonder. I wonder if we use the word "stewardship" just as an excuse to be LESS generous! Would Jesus give them money? Would Jesus wish He had a social worker to ask the RIGHT questions? Or would Jesus use his last dollar to help that person out? I find myself wondering if the absurdity and scandal of the cross is truly softened by our American, westernized, version of Christianity? Jesus in an absurd display of generosity gave His life! Jesus, in a scandalous show of grace stopped a whole crowd from stoning an adulterer in the act! Why are we so afraid of this kind of absurd and scandalous grace and hospitality? What are we afraid of? Are we afraid of going broke? Are we afraid that we won't have enough for ourselves? Whatever happened to the absurd kind of trust that the Israelites were called to? When did we lose that kind of trust in the PROVISION and GRACE of God?
I'm not perfect by any means and I'm just as guilty today in my anxiety and uncomfort in this face of my neighbor in need. I will say this though. We were worried about the screening process and giving the "right" or "appropriate" resources. I will say this though...this woman today was willing to give us a picture of her children. Probably all she could really give as a sign of appreciation. Which offering was God more please with - her gift of a photo - possibly all she could give or our gift of some clothes and food that cost us nothing? I can't tell you how challenged I am by these thoughts. May I live out a Christianity that is so gracious, loving, daring, risky and scandalous that my life looks more like Jesus everyday! I'm sick and tired of a wimpy Christianity. Last time I checked the goal was to be the hands and feet of Jesus. Last time I checked those hands and feet were pierced. Christianity takes a faith and trust in a God who CAN make me like Jesus. Not by my effort but by God's Spririt! If that's an ideal...then I guess I'm guilty as charged as an IDEALIST!
PEACE ON THE JOURNEY
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